Memorable Moments in an Alien World











{September 8, 2012}   When There Are Just Too Many Zeros

No, I’m not referring to binary code. Nor am I making reference to the UK band.

This week something INCREDIBLE happened. I received a paycheck after two months of, well, NOT getting paid. I went to the bank to deposit my check and as I was conversing with the teller, I noticed something out of the ordinary. As he got my cash ready, I let myself take a good, long look at the keypad on which I had just typed my PIN.

Finally, I looked at the teller and laughed. I told him that this particular branch of Chase must handle very wealthy clientele. Questioningly he looked at me, but nodded and said, “Yes, I suppose we do. What makes you say that, though?” Read the rest of this entry »



{July 21, 2012}   Rage of the Rich

A couple weeks ago I decided to stop at Chipotle to grab something to eat. Usually I frequent the one in Santa Monica, but today I decided to try the one in Beverly Hills, as its proximity is much closer to my apartment.

Driving down North Beverly Drive at 1:15p was a traffic nightmare. After looping a few blocks for about 20 minutes, I almost gave up and went home, but my love of Chipotle caused me to keep driving – and I’m glad I did, for I found a free parking garage right in the center of Beverly Hills (who’d have thought?!). I pulled in and quickly realized that this was a smallest parking garage that I had ever entered. I drove in and the lot curved around in a backward C-shape and…that was it. It was full to the max (no surprise, there were only about 20 spots!). That being the case, I turned around and began to slowly make my way around the curve.

As I did, I saw an impeccably dressed woman walking towards a car that cost more than a Harvard degree. Thrilled to finally be catching a break in this foolish pretense of a parking garage, I called out my window to her in exuberance, “Thank you!” True to her Beverly Hills cultivation, she ignored me completely, raising her nose up conspicuously high in the air, her perfect heels clicking away as she stepped to her millionaire-obile.

Whatever. I was getting a spot!

As I waited for her to get into her car – whose street value could feed half the hungry in LA – I found myself in a predicament. Read the rest of this entry »



et cetera